What is the reason for the sudden spate of attention hungry, life-revealing, world-upturning status messages on Facebook? I mean, really why? What kind of desperation and insecurity would drive you to post status updates reminiscent of a simpering Manisha Koirala, a psychotic Urmila or a megalomaniac Mithun?
Types
·The World is Hopeless – Cant belive dis is happening. Need al of u rite by me...nowwwww! Sob sob sob. If you just analyze it closely, the person is shrieking out for some sympathy. This is the kind I hate the most. Why on earth will any sane woman/man want to scream out their tragedies from the rooftop? But I guess the very fact of you being open to posting such messages to some 500 odd people negates the sensibility part. My faulty question. At last, 50 comments of ‘low u honey’, ‘mwahh don’t worry’ later and much nausea on my part, things subside.
·I denounce you - Hate people pretending dey care!!
in d end deyr all just selfish... Seriously? Now you realized it? And pray, now that you have made your feelings known to all and sundry, I bet all the selfish people in the world are shedding tears of remorse and queing up to mortify themselves before Your Highness.
·The Ultimate Realization - Realized thr r sooooo many ppl who luv u n care fer u n u jst havnt noticed em at all...have my eyes wide open nw..aint gna miss ne1 nemre...mwaaaah. Realized? Good. Now you might start working on those missing vowels. Hope you walk the rest of your life with eyes wide open and stop inflicting torture upon us innocent souls.
Ah, but I guess I am complaining in vain. It must be a deeply embedded faculty in our system to make Facebook the sole privy to our life’s agonies. Think of it. Boss at office gave me a terrible glare and insulted me. Should I vent it out to my close friends in private, bitch about it and just get drunk? Nope. That just seems too complicated. Those friends must be busy with their own shit too. First, I must log in to Facebook and post a burning, rebellious status message about this so my entire network of 600 (seriously!) ‘friends’ know about it, arouse their curiosity and profess their ‘lowe’ for me. Such genuine concerns do blot out the shitty feeling and make feel obnoxiously bubbly and wired again. Hurray!
And then comes the Facebook albums! Nope, the Facebook-savvy, outgoing people are not just satiated with clicking a few good pictures of them having fun. They have to click it from all possible angles. With all possible emotions. I guess my broadband charge will run out if I take the onus of describing the hideous faces I have seen of people, in the name of having fun! It’s even more nauseating and puke-inducing than the trailer of Twilight eclipse.
Smirk at me for being old school, but I would rather go to a party and enjoy it than making myself busy with taking photographic proofs showing what an absolute blast I had. Reminds me of a small such incident in Hard Rock café. A good band. Great drinks. Delicious starters. I was quite enjoying the music when I noticed these two girls taking pictures of themselves with different smiles and tilts of head rather than enjoying the energy of the place. And when they were not clicking away to glory, they were just busy with their own cell phones, leave alone talking to each other.
Then again, I think, social networking is a kind of peer pressure. Isn’t it? It’s all about cool videos, sassy quips, rocking pictures and SOS calls. I guess, me and a few other similar souls are headed to extinction.
